I was fine until I saw the mashed potatoes-then we all started crying.

It had been nine weeks—only nine weeks since Sebastian died. I was fumbling my way through this grief fog, unable to see clearly because of the constant tears that would not stop flowing. My life was unexpectedly engulfed by gushing water from the tsunami that hit me when Sebastian took his life and left me tangled in the debris of his death, unable to sort through the pieces of my destroyed life. Steve, my husband, and our daughter, Isabel, were also mourning their son and brother, though very differently from me.

You can read my latest essay on my Substack page here: 

https://jackiembaker.substack.com/p/crying-in-my-mashed-potatoes